Analyzing Myself

I know I get way too obsessed about our art challenges. Once I’ve decided on the direction I want to go in, I can’t stop thinking about it. Why do I do this? It’s not that I’m competitive or need to be noticed. Most of the time I’m so immersed in my own little world that it’s a pleasure to step out of it and discover what other artists are doing – or more accurately, when I see how creative the other members of the club are, it enlarges my world and makes it full of possibilities.
No, I think my problem is that I’m too task-oriented. After being self-employed for so many years, I’m geared to deadlines and pushing myself forward to meet them. Once I know what my approach is, I want to focus all my energy on finding out what the end point will be. Instead of researching our trip to Boston next week, which is really more of a priority, I’m making sketches and endlessly digging through boxes of fabric, embellishments and paint. This time I’m trying to control my inclination to complicate things by reminding myself: “What is it that I’m really trying to express here?”